Sunday, July 18, 2010

my secret dream

When I joined Kelly at a A Stuffed Life , to participate in this party she dreamed up, it seemed kismet at the time. I was giving a lot of deep thought to my life, where it is at, what direction it is going, what I want out of the near and far future, what are the dreams that keep me going when all else falls away.

What has become blatantly clear to me at this point in my life, is that my secret dream can no longer remain secret. It has to be revealed, so that I may start to create it. In real time, for the magic of physical manifestation, it has to be spoken.

I have been a gypsy most of my adult life. I have lived in 8 states in 13 years, in many many houses, trailers, apartments. Even a camper for the better part of a year, exploring the west coast, trying to find my PLACE. Where I felt that I could live my life , the way I wanted. I looked and plotted and chose places  at some times, and other times I watched for signs and followed the universe clues as to where I next belonged. It was at times hard, some times exhilarating, all of the time learning and growing and clarifying what is important and what, not so much. Priorities shifted, belongings left behind, friends gathered and collected in every place. I often thought of myself a child of the stars, bound to travel endlessly, because my PLACE never materialized. I thought for sure when I found it , I would know it. Deep in my soul like an unmistakable beat of the heart.



When we were living in Arizona, my intuition told me that I needed to come back to New Mexico. There were reservations, there were doubts, but the thought kept coming back to my soul over and over, it would not be ignored. The universe provided me with a lead on a sublease close enough to Santa Fe, that when I heard about it, my heart lept up, and I knew I had to see it. I knew I had to have it.




Against many, many odds the universe conspired to get me here, to this house. Within a month we were moving from Arizona, to New Mexico. I drove all day and night in a borrowed suburban, with 4 kids, 2 babies under the age of 2, 2 large dogs, 5 cats, and pulling a u haul.

That was October of 2008.

Every day since the day we moved in, I have dreamed of making this house mine.



We are not in the position right now to buy a house. So my dream has stayed secret. But the universe works in mysterious ways, and I have a feeling that if I follow those instincts, the same ones that led me here, the ones that guide me in the unknown, I just may be able to make this dream a reality.



This is my secret midsummer night dream


I dream of cooking at my own hearth


I dream of working at my own corner office


I dream of laying my head to sleep at night, knowing that I never have to move again, if I do not want too. That is my secret midsummer nights dream.

Thanks to Kelly for dreaming up the dream, and inspiring me to come out of the closet, one step colser to making my dream a reality.

What is your secret dream?

Many blessings, Peace and Love, chella

15 comments:

  1. Thank you for sharing your dream, hope it all comes true for you, it's a beautiful house.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I hope all your dreams and wishes come true-love you -mom

    ReplyDelete
  3. What a beautifully written piece! I have visited New Mexico and know it to be very beautiful.

    Thanks for sharing your dream. I hope the universe blesses you and your loved ones with much contentment and peace...

    Lynette

    ReplyDelete
  4. Beautiful, beautiful dream. I love that your dream called to you. I think the best dreams do. It will happen, just keep believing. I also believe there is true power to voicing those dreams.
    Many happy and enchanting adventures to you and your sweet family.

    Tootles,
    FawnDear

    ReplyDelete
  5. I had to come and see what your dream was after you visited my blog :-) I hope your dream comes true one day it looks like a beautiful place to settle.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I'm keeping fingers, toes, eyes crossed for you.I have always believed in the power of positive thinking and I know deep inside my heart that one day your dream will come true.Big hugs and please please dont trouble yourself about this gift.Making a new friend is a wonderful gift and I am thankful for you Sweet Chella.Warmest Regards,Cat

    ReplyDelete
  7. Thank you for sharing your beautiful dream ~ one that I hope comes true for you. I've traveled to New Mexico several times in the past and have always felt a spiritual connection there. What a wonderful place to call home and pursue your dream! Blessings, Jenn

    ReplyDelete
  8. I am one that truly believes if you think about it and really feel it in your bones (like getting the goosebumps) you can make anything happen! Keep being positive :) Thanks for sharing w all of us

    ReplyDelete
  9. Hope your dream comes true! I truly enjoyed this post. Thank you for sharing and remember, never stop believing XO

    ReplyDelete
  10. your place is so wonderful, so colorful and whimsical and special....I suspect much like you. How very brave and wonderful to have shared your dream. I have enjoyed reading all of it.
    I have not felt well enough to photograph the tent event until yesterday. so the kiddos are planning on doing the photo shoot this evening. They always make me life with their grandious plans. Always a little over the top. hehe
    Now keep in mind. This cost the original person about $15 to ship to me. Won't be nearly that much to you but whoever you select to send it on to will cost you some......so let me know if you really want to play or should I find someone else. It is no big deal either way, I just wanted you to be aware. Let me know what you decide neighbor.........Oma linda

    ReplyDelete
  11. I hope that your dream becomes reality. Until then, you have created a charming and tranquil home! It is very inviting.

    The photos of your children on your sidebar are beautiful. You have a lovely family.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I share your dream! Oh to paint the walls any color I want! : ) I hope you get your dream soon! Thanks for adding my Adventures in Pretty blog to your list-what a lovely compliment! I have always dreamed have having two homes-one in the Pacific Northwest and one in New Mexico. I like the contrast of the two areas. Your place is beautiful. I like the fun and mystery and joy with which you decorated. Best of luck to you!!!

    ReplyDelete
  13. First let me say thank you for coming over and visiting my blog....and let me welcome you as a new follower! I love your dream.....and I believe that the Universe will hear you and grant you your wish. My dream is to live in my PLACE....Ocracoke, NC.....one day.....but it's expensive.....and I don't know if I will ever be able to actually live there....but if not....I will be happy with being able to visit as often as possible.

    ReplyDelete

Followers